Friday, June 25, 2010

Say Goodbye to Hollywood

Today marks the final day of HCDA Office favorite and former child actor Will "Wombelina" Womble.

When I left the Office in December of 2008, my two was a prosecutor who has asked not to be named on my blog, so I will use the pseudonym "Justin Keeter", and my three was Womble. I had not known Womble prior to him coming to work in the Fighting 339th, and knew nothing more about him other than he used to be Ricky Schroeder's stunt-double on Silver Spoons. I quickly researched Womble's background by checking, and found that he actually had a distinguished film career, playing the role of "Corpse" in several prominent television series such as "J.A.G.", "Judging Amy", and "Designing Women". (Yeah, Will, I know that's an old joke, but I never get tired of it.) He also had a brief part as "Scared Nurse" in Michael Bay's "Pearl Harbor".

It was during his illustrious career that he finally got the part of attorney "Dodge Rosen" in "Judging Amy", that Will decided to take on the role of a lifetime, and play a lawyer at the Harris County District Attorney's Office. He came to work a little over three years ago, and quickly became a very popular figure within the Office. His tales of getting facials with Oprah and apparently having even met Jon Hamm once had his co-workers enthralled.

So much so, that I'm not sure any of us ever checked to see if he actually had a law degree, come to think of it . . .

He soon translated his vast experience with infomercials into successful voir dires -- a five minute re-enactment of a burglar alarm commercial to illustrate how to interpret "intent" was particularly moving. He also channeled his dramatic side into closing arguments. Those of us in the courtroom will never forget his booming Jack Nicholson impression as he yelled: "You can't handle the toilet?!?!" to a shocked jury.

And in the role of his life, he even pretended to be my girlfriend at one point. You'll have to ask him about that one.

Between that, and the odd assortment of ladies' dresses that Womble kept in his office for no apparent reason, he was quite a character.

But the important thing to remember about Wombelina isn't just that he was a character, but that he also has character. Although I like to make fun of him, Will was a damn good prosecutor. He analyzed cases well. He listened to the defense bar. He listened to victims.

He always did what was right.

He worked his butt off for Harris County and he wasn't afraid to do the right thing even if it meant getting in trouble with the higher ups. He was a leader in the Office and a leader with integrity, smarts, and trial skills. He would have made an outstanding career prosecutor.

He'll make an even better defense attorney.

So, folks, get ready for the new Law Offices of Dodge Rosen, coming to you this summer.

Good luck, Wombelina.

And I look forward to seeing you in the next Danielle Steele mini-series as Corpse # 3.


Anonymous said...

Is Womble taking his dresses with him?

Anonymous said...

Is Womble the tall attractive prosecutor who looks like he would star in The Great Gatsby? A photo would help those of us who are name challenged.

Anonymous said...

To receive that sort of "praise" from the folliclely-challenged M.N., esquire, shows that Womble, with all the dresses, had the sheer will to deal with the worst of the worst. Personally, I think MN paid him to wear the dresses, but I can't be sure.

Anonymous said...

You've got a lot of balls labeling this humor.


Anonymous said...

This is a very strange blog entry.

Anonymous said...

Those of us who don't know the full story don't get it. More please...

Anonymous said...

I agree with 11:10, most of us don't get the joke.

Anonymous said...

I just wanted to wish Will the best. I don't know if he remembers how we met but I do. He made quite an impression and I know he will do well in private practice. Good move Will.

Edward D. Porter

Anonymous said...

He will certainly do well in private practice. A testament to the quality of the experience one receives at the HCDA office. NOT because of the quality of the office, but by the quality of the criminals in our county and the quality of the defense attorneys who represent them.... Many of whom were once prosecutors... How's that for cirular logic?

Anonymous said...

I get it. :). Here's to wearing your dresses with pride, Womble!!! You are outstanding. You must start a website so I can follow your themes again. A million blessings to you!!