Where else but Texas, in the midst of everything else, could you get an awesome story like this?
http://www.chron.com/disp/story.mpl/front/5808490.html
Honestly, there are so many lawyer jokes or Rosenthal jokes that can come out of this, that I truly don't know where to begin.
An insider's view of what is really happening in the Harris County Criminal Courts
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Guiney
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2 comments:
Too much time on my hands. I can't resist . . .
"Alarmed by a 4-foot rat snake found in a janitor's closet . . ." No, not a 4-foot Roach. Really. They said "snake."
"Wildlife experts Thursday searched the Harris County Criminal Justice Center's fourth floor for signs that more reptiles had infested the headquarters of the district attorney's office." They may want to check back around mid-January.
"But using a snake to assault someone is illegal." That really depends on how hard you're swinging it.
"An investigation has been launched to determine how the snake reached the busy criminal courts building's fourth floor." You can bet your ass it didn't take the elevator . . . it would still be waiting.
"If they're shaking their tales in dry leaves, they sound exactly like a rattlesnake." Note to Editor: "Shaking tales" is not to be confused with boasting, and probably is not what the writer intended to say.
"Wednesday's snake was turned over to animal control." Apparently, no one knew the Bar Association's number.
"'Our security machines just detect metal items,' Hoffman said. 'I guess if you put a snake in a briefcase you could get it through.'" Get real. If you put a Ryder truck in a briefcase, you could get it through.
Leviathan
I was accused of assault by snake once--by the ladies.
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